"I'll do it on my own. You don't have to touch me."

"Both of us probably drank too much tonight. My apologies. You don't have to feel too apologetic either. It's normal for men to be like this sometimes. Please don't take it too seriously."

[...and much softer, like it's physically hard for him to say it, even to a degree past how hard it is for him to speak at length]

You also thanked me and apologized.